Friday, December 29, 2017

Submissive's Prayer No 2

Obedience was not
Enough for you.
In an Orwellian fantasy
You demanded
Suffering too.

Suffering to
Bend my will
As on bended
Knees, I wait
In silence

As if the trinity
Of obedience
Suffering and silence
Would a saintly
Submissive, make me

Sunday’s of singing
Sermons of damnation
Sex today traded
For future
Salvation

Instead, I’ll
Take the sex
I may not be
Submissive, or
Saintly

But I prefer
The breathing
Of ecstasy
To this silence
Of Salvation


Thursday, December 28, 2017

Submissive's Prayer - No 1


I kneel
I wait
Forgive me
Father
I speak

Master
You called
My name
I wait
To serve

I wait
Your blessing
The hardness
Of ecstasy
To release

La petite mort
Of oblivion
Union enjoined
With you
Complete

I seek
salvation
Father, Master
I wait
Your release

I wait,
Waiting
In silent
Empty
Stillness

Forgiveness
Denied,
Service ignored
Speech unheard
Ecstasy frustrated

Was it me?
Was it you?
Silence
Remains

Unbroken

Sunday, December 24, 2017

The Intimate Stranger


I ask you
How you are.
But don’t
Answer me
I don’t want
The burden
Of knowing
It’s not that
I’m callous, I
Just don’t care

Gift me
The intimacy
Of your body
Let me
Explore its
Geography
By senses
Touch and smell
Don’t talk
Don’t tell

Words, weigh
Me down
Flagellating me
Flaccid with
Their sound
Be quiet
Let me rise
Hard and proud
And plough your
Spaces in silence

Spent, let me
Hold you
In the stillness
While our
Souls draw
Breath
Then leave my
Bed, not quite
A stranger, an
Intimate stranger


Saturday, December 23, 2017

Mysteries No 4


Light

I wake
Watching
Leaves caressed
Shimmer
A rustling
Waterfall of
Green and gold
As sunlight
Not yet hardened
Into ferocity
Weaves its way
Through them

If the Unknown
Is light, I hope
They are, of  
The morning light
A caressing light
That laces
Its way
Around me
Weaving its
Presence, in
The shadows
Of my life

I have
Grown tired
Of men’s
Ferocities
Their heat
Claiming the light
To hide
Insecurities
I need
My shadows
Those cool
Still places

My shadows
Places I hide
Spaces where
Light does not
Penetrate
Perhaps,
Salvation is in
The shadows
Soul spaces
Hidden
From the

Light 

Wednesday, December 20, 2017

Mysteries No 3

Love

Love is patient
So, Paul says
I think he got
It wrong

It is us, who
Must learn
To wait, to
Patient be

Instead, anxious
Aggrieved
Agitated
We doubt

Convinced
We are wrong,
That love has
Passed us by

Yet love
Is by our side
Silent
In its embrace

We want
The love
We are convinced
We want

Yet love
Gives us
The love
We need

We need the
Patience, to wait
To see, the
Love, we need.

Patience to
Settle into
Love’s embrace
Knowing

We are love
For love, has been
Patient

Waiting for us.

Mysteries No 2

Water

I was baptized
Twice
Fully immersed
Once in faith
Twice in death

The first was
A fantasy
Faith faltering
Deteriorating
As droplets dried

Conviction bleeding
Out into guilt.
Guilt grown weary
Withering into
Wistful doubt.

Faith, in its
Going, left
A shadow
But death is made
Of sterner stuff

No sooner had
Your ashes scattered
You grabbed
The waves and
Rolled them back

Immersing me
You embraced me
One last time
Ashes scattered
Ashes inhaled

Your essence
Given back with
Grief to life
Burnt its way
Into me

You came from me
In a moment of love
And in your going
You gave yourself
Back to me

In the water
Life’s circle
Is complete
As I gave you life,
You gave me death



Monday, December 18, 2017

Mysteries No 1

Silence  

Silence
As loud as
A leaf falling
The pervading
Stillness, that
Stops

The endless
Waterfall of
Words, spilling
Into time
Halted, wilted
Withered

Mystery found
In the stillness
Between the seconds
Time quietened
Eternity seeping
Into silence

I stand in
This silence
Before the
Stillness
Surrounded
By quietness

As the leaf
Falls in silence
I fall into
The stillness
Of the eternal
Mystery

Falling, I fall
Into mystery
The stillness
Of the eternal
The place

Where I am

Sunday, December 17, 2017

Loss


It’s leaving
Was wistful.
Noticed more
Gone, than in
The going.

Dogma dulled
As doubt’s
Inevitability
Eroded creedal
certainty

Prayers, first
Abbreviated,
Grew silent
Tired of
Echoing words

I do not
Grieve my loss
Gritted memories
Of a more
Gullible time

Yet still, some
Sunday evenings
In the silence
I hear those
Echoes of

Faith’s blind
Certainty, her
Blissful confidence
In the inclusion of
Being the called

Somewhere
On this journey
At some point
I lost my faith,
Yet,

I am not lost
For in the loosing
I have learnt,
To be content in
Uncertain doubt


Friday, December 8, 2017

The Wall


The sunlight, dances
On your cheek

You think, I am
Psychoanalysing you

What I cannot speak
Silent must remain

The tremor of
Time warping
Fractures reality
Or is it
Fantasy?

Did once
I know you?

Did once, we
Dance with
Swords?

Cold kiss
Of metal, penetrating
What desire
Could not do

Your fierceness
Unabated, grown
More subtle
Over years

Now you
Penetrate
With words
These walls
Of mine

We waltz
With glances
Heated with
Desire, and
Laugh to cover
Our lust

Where once
Your sword
Slit me
Now words
Undo me

The sunlight dances
On your cheek

While I retreat
Behind this wall
Of mine

What I want to say

Silent must remain.

Saturday, December 2, 2017

Hyde Park


Leaves tinseled
With sunlight
Whisper above me
While wisps of
Wind frolic
Amongst branches
Swaying in
Symphonic irritation

I lie below
Reflecting
What is above
Not the tinselling
Or the frolicking
Nor the whispering
But the
Symphonic irritation

The symphonic
Irritation of
Nerves stretched
Taunt, over strung
And tightened
Twang against
The metallic tones
Of muted skies.