Friday, January 30, 2015

Penance?


I did penance
In the silence of my soul
The endless repetition
Of mea culpa’s birthing
By steady replication
A stalagmite of desire

Mea culpa
Mea culpa
Mea maxima culpa

In psyche’s vault
I knelt to pray
To heaven, congested
With words piled on words
It was easier to kneel
Before the body of desire

Mea culpa
Mea culpa
Mea maxima culpa

Forgiveness
Could not quench
My thirst
No grace
Could lead
Me home

Amen
So be it
I rose in the glory
Of desires full bloom
I stood, and
Fell in benediction

I rose, raptured
With a kiss
Cast out from the garden
I came home, to myself
Lusts longing now

At peace

Sunday, January 25, 2015

January 2015


She flits with indecent haste
Across times floor boards
As if ashamed
Of new beginnings

Her moments, long
In sensuous sunlight
Slip quickly and pool
Into past days

Is it simply my age?
Times accelerating trajectory
Racing with indecent haste
Blurring boundary lines of moments

Preparing to sling me
Into eternity, for I am
Closer to the beginning
Of the Returning

My days, more
Compressed, compacted
By demands, yapping  
With irritating insistence

Quarrel against
The languid longing
Of desire, to stay
Awhile in this moment

I still enjoy
New beginnings
Pleasure, stroked with the
Wistful knowledge of past endings

But, January has already
Slipped her moorings
While I, I want to stay

A moment longer

Monday, January 19, 2015

Sunday Afternoon


I remember it well
Though I could never find it now
It stood, somewhere
Out the back of Kerang
Down some corrugated road
Grown insignificant by
Time and neglect

A road much like life
Going on, but who knows where?
We find out when we get there
It stood off this road
Weather board, weather beaten
Foundations gripping the drifting grit
With arthritic tenacity

The faithful gathered, more
From repetition than any great desire
Prayers soggy from sweat
Trickle between the floor boards
At home in dust
Than rising to
Heaven’s vault

I am a bad piano player
It is not a good piano
Ours is a brief, succinct affair
Bashing out off key hymns
As if by noise alone
We can bring
The resurrection

But weariness from the week
And Sunday lunch
Anaesthetise the faithful
And wrapped in heat
They sit, warm cadavers’
Unresuscitated
By my fathers fervour

Released
By a benediction
They drift away
Through heat and dust
We take that road again
The corrugated road

That goes, who knows where

Sunday, January 18, 2015

Strangled


It was subtle
Less violent than expected
Anger with a velvet glove
Its tightening grip
Sensually smothering
My words dribble
And pool in unformed
Sentences

It was the ferocity
Of his certainty
Frustrated righteousness
Fermented, solidified
Into fanatical rage
That conceded no
Dissention, placidly
Choking difference

My difference
He hated
A pacifist by belief
He had learnt to
Strangle by stealth
Secrecy preferred
To maintain the
Mirage of peace

He’s long gone
The imprint of his hand
Disembodied, phantom like
I still feel, but I have learnt
In the sensuous silence
To write what I cannot speak
The doubting whiteness of the page

Refreshing after fanatical rage

Saturday, January 17, 2015

Endings


The ending was more
A fizzle
Champagne, long
Gone flat
In fact, for me
This bottled togetherness
Wrapped in colourful disguise
Had never been uncorked

Love expired
Under the weight
Of its astigmatism
Fantasies refracted
Imploded
With a neural pop
In the unbearable lightness
Of reality

Still,
It was an ending
Traces of my presence
Gone with a vigorous clean
My scent removed
With a squirt of
Fresh after-shave
And it was over

Do I grieve the ending?
Oh, yes there’s pain
But grief?
I have grieved for faith
For his final breath
For promises I could not keep
But this?
Shall I grieve for this?

No
Don’t think me hard,
It’s just I’ve learnt
With pain
And now with more
Equanimity
The endings

Of love

Wednesday, January 14, 2015

Desire in the afternoon


We had a pact
For just a few
Brief hours
Ask no questions
Tell no truths
It’s complicated
The unlocked lock
On Pandora’s box
That’s best kept shut

Our bodies pressed
In ravenous embrace
Rivulets of sweat
Pool between us
The tears we cannot cry
For we are men
Complications
Must be borne
Dry eyed, wet skinned

Do not belittle
Desire
Nor begrudge
This fleeting time
Love?
It’s nothing grand
Like that
It’s just the afternoon’s desire

Come, spent, gone

Tuesday, January 13, 2015

Kiss


Kiss me hard and long
With eyes glazed tight
Kiss me with hope
That love will grow
Kiss me long enough
It might

Kiss me soft with
Passion hot
Kiss me
In the illusions
Of your mind
I’ll be what you want

Kiss me when
Hard and hot
When lust strides out
With false intent
Kiss me
I too can pretend

Kiss me and
Keep your mind shut
This room of love
Is swept bare, empty
Kiss me

And seal the lock

Sunday, January 11, 2015

Hello


Hello, my old friend
You’ve come to walk
With me again
To pound once more
Memories paths

You know, you’re not
A friend from choice
Would I choose your
Hugs of heartache?
Your searing kiss of pain

Yet you gambolled into
My life with callous disregard
Scattered pain’s unreasonableness
And shattered the sacred
Into shards

And now?
Once more
You come again
But I?
I now know your pain

So come my friend
And dance with me
Let’s waltz these weeks away
And while you lead me into pain

I’ll lead you into life again

Saturday, January 10, 2015

Love's Distraction

 
Love, a winters’ vine
Survived two seasons, then
Bowed, withered and expired

Love started with a kiss
Then silently and seductively
It strangled

Love promised bliss
Sweet nectar of the gods
But scorched and parched

Love gave companionship
Loneliness banished along
With the self

Searching for another
To distract us from our distraction
We call it love